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Bert And Ernie Are Not Gay

August 12, 2011

What would Fred Phelps say?

Bert and Ernie are not gay.

That is, according to “Sesame Street,” which released an official statement on the matter on Thursday responding to an online campaign calling for the pair to be married.

“Bert and Ernie are best friends,” the statement posted on Sesame Street’s Facebook page reads. “They were created to teach preschoolers that people can be good friends with those who are very different from themselves.”

The statement continues: “Even though they are identified as male characters and possess many human traits and characteristics (as most Sesame Street Muppets™ do), they remain puppets, and do not have a sexual orientation.”

The assertion was questioned by a number of commenters on Sesame Street’s Facebook wall.

“Muppets do not have sexual orientation?” Sharkey Violet wrote. “So all along Miss Piggy was after Kermit for his frog legs for supper?”

“It just seems to me that you can’t say puppets don’t have a sexual orientation when there have been plenty of cases of hetero courtship on Sesame Street over the years,” Scott Hanson wrote. “The Count has had several girlfriends, to name just one example.”

  1. Annie K. permalink
    August 12, 2011 7:02 PM

    I knew that. I saw Ernie out with women on several occasions.
    So now that this much longer-standing Birther type issue has finally been cleared up I hope it will pave the way to swift resolution of the Purple TeleTubbie situation. That has dragged on long enough

    BREAKING NEWS (sorry but I gotta do that all caps thing to fit in here in the Cheddarsphere)

    He’s also strict Evangelical (only an evangelical would have hair like that. Kind of a cross between Osmond Hair and Blagojevich Hair, blaaargh maybe little Glenn Campbell thrown in. I hate hair like that), so anyway he’s in SERIOUS denial, and yet GayDars continue to go wild when the Ken-ster comes around…and what’s with the slow pan of the a$$-in-jeans shot here? shades of George Michael in Faith, eh Ken?

    oh hey all this talk of jeans…
    here’s a fatal Dose o’ Dwight

  2. Steve Adams permalink
    August 12, 2011 1:51 PM

    Some people have way too much time on their hands……

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