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Pull Up Your Saggy Pants Now Law In Flordia, Let’s Make It National

September 6, 2011

This weekend at the mall I noticed a young couple laughing and pointing at something, and so followed the general line of direction of the aimed finger and saw quite a sight.

Not an unusal one, but still quite a sight.

A caucasian teenager, about age 17, was hobbling about as he tried to keep up with what appeared to be his mother.  She was walking in a normal fashion, but the kid had his shorts so low around the lower part of his butt, (or was it the top of his legs?) that it appeared from the gait he had just unmounted from a horse following a three-day ride. 

As I was looking in the direction of the young ‘cowboy’ I almost ran into an older and taller young black man who was holding his pants up as he walked so they would not slip completely around his ankles.  In one hand that clasped his upper portion of his shorts he held a credit card.  Even with his hands holding his shorts I am not sure they were high enough to have covered the family jewels.

I mused that it was probably best to just carry the credit card as a wallet to contain it would only add weight to the pants he had to hold up!  With his hands tied up holding fabric there was no way to make a transaction anyway, and then how would he have carried merchandise while not mooning the mall?

A couple of years ago, after this dreadful trend was well-established among some young men I asked a friendly looking young guy on State Street why anyone would want to be so encumbered with a fashion statement.  Furthermore, what precisely was the statement being made?

He informed me that his brothers in prison were not allowed belts and he walked in honor of them.   I recall I responded that prisoners were not allowed conjugal visits and so wondered if he was abstaining too.  His response was “now you’re talking —–“.

I have no way of knowing why young people think it sexy or hip to dress in such a fashion, but I can bet employers do not find it a quality they are looking for in any industry.  As such, I am at a loss to understand why parents are not more in control of making sure their kids look less foolish, and make them act more appropriately in public places.

This weekend in the newspaper I had to applaud the action taken by Southwest Airlines when they bounced Billie Joe Armstrong over his trouser problem. The Green Day singer was kicked off a flight due to his low-slung crotch.

Amen.

Same praise goes to Florida for passing a law that states in their public schools belts must be used, and pants pulled up and made to look respectable.  The law provides that boys may be suspended for a repeat sag offense.  Girls also need to hike the jeans.

Call me whatever but I am not in the mood to see anyone’s underwear while waiting in line to check out at a store, or while walking in the mall.  I also certainly do not want to see low slung boxers riding along knowing that just the wrong move might bring a whole new ‘face’ into view!

Every generation has something it needs to do in order to show everyone else they are more in touch than others.  Might we now have these kids show us all that they know how to use a local haberdasher.

2 Comments
  1. amigay permalink
    September 9, 2011 4:52 PM

    I wouldn’t mind so much if the guy and the pants were clean.

  2. September 6, 2011 10:47 AM

    It ain’t just ’cause of belts that prisoners let their pants sag – it is to show that they are willing and able to provide sexual favors to other men. While it may not be proper to play into homophobic-fears, at least two lads I know stopped with this latest fad after being informed of that factoid.

    That said, I thought that every blog post on this issue had to have the “Damn kids! Get off my lawn” quote in there somewhere…you’re slacking. 😛

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